1-ghiamat mishe bad hame adama miyan. khoda mige har ki dorogh bege mitereke. 1 nafar mige man adame khobiyam bad mitereke,badi mige manam adame khaili khobi boodam mitereke,nobat be torke mirese ta miyad bege man adame...... mitereke! 
2-char panj ta torke savare asansoor bodan bad nemidonestan chi kar konan hey invar onvaro nega mikonan chizi nemifaman! 
bad yeho yeki miad savar mishe dokme tabaghe 3 o mizane. yeki az torke dad mizane baraye salamatie aghaye ranande salavat! 
3-Torke jorab mikhare barash bozorg booode jelosh panbe mizare!
4-ye roz too kavir loot ye torkaro zire lahaf peida mikonan azash miporsan : shoma torkin?...torke mige : yani az zire lahafam maloome?! 
5-torke dashte khatere tarif mikarde,mige:ma sale 49 ba 2 nafar davamoon shod,albate sale 49 do nafar kheili bood! 
6-be ye turke moghime USA migan ba "ebadat" jomle besaz. mige "don't worry about that"! 
7-ye rooz be ye torke migam ba balesh jomle besaz mige YE ROOZ RAFTAM SHEKAR ZADAM TOO BALESH bad migam oon balesh ke na. mige KHOB YE ROOZ RAFTAM SHEKAR ZADAM BE IN BALESH NA OON BALESH bad migam aslan balesho vel kon ba toshak jomle besaz bad mige KHOB RAFTAM SHEKAR TOSHAK BOODAM KE BEZANAM BE IN BALESH YA OON BALESH! 
8-ye bar torke mikhaste mikh bezane be divar mikho bar ax mizare va shoroo mikone be koboondan yeho ye lore mirese mige ajab giji hasti to, oon male divare rooberoo e! 
9-ye bar do ta ghazvini hamdige ro too khaiyaboon mibinan . yekishoon mige salam hasan agha ! oon yeki mige : Be ja nemiyaram . mige : Hasan agha chetor mano nemishnasin . mano yadetoon nemiyad ? miga :Bebakhshid be ja nemiyaram . mige: hasan agha ! manam Akbar . mige : E !? salam akbar agha ! bebakhshid , az jelo nashnakhtam!
10-ye zany vase bachash lalaei mikhoonde bad az nim saat bachehe mige "hala dige khafe sho mikham bekhabam"!
11-be torke migan nemikhay adam shi?mige man az in gherti bazia khosham nemiad! 
12-1 bar torke mire make be sheytoon sang bezane badesh sangash tamoom mishe shoroo mikone fohsh dadan! 
13-moaleme be shagerdesh mige boro ye moorche nar peyda kon vardar biar bachehe fardash ye moorche miare moleme mige khob to hala az koja fahmidi in morche he nare bache he mige akhe jeloo dare maderese dokhtaroone peydash kardam!
14-be ye fozool e migan nesfe donya ro behet miDm,dige fozuli nakon.miporse:nesfe digasho be ki midin?!
15-ta divoone ham otaghi boodan,ye rooz khabar ovordan ke 2tashoon bala pain miparan migan ke ma sibzamini hastim va darim too roghan sorkh mishim va sevomi saket nesheste! modire bimarestan ham tebghe mamool raft ke in divoone ro morkhas kone porsid to cherea ba doostanat nisti?? oon ham goft:"akhe man kafe mahitabe chasbidam!
16-torke mire carwash behesh migan pas mashinet koosh? mige rah nazdik bood piyade oomadam!
17-Torke Mire Mashad , Jeloye Haram Mige: Ya emam Ali, Ghorboone Labe teshnat, Fadaye do daste boridat, pas key zohoor mikoni, khaste shodam inghadar oomdam ghom! 
18-be torke migan esme emamo begoo mige sooj migan tooye in hame emam ma sooj nadarim mige khodam didam poshte oon otoboose neveshte bood yasooj!
19-torke zang mizane mobaile refighesh mibine ye khanomi mige moshtarake morede nazar dar dastras nemibashad. torke mige oono velesh kon khodet chetori?!
20-17-pesare o dokhtare dashtan ghadam mizadan pesare be dokhtare mige doost dari oonjaei ro ke khatne kardam neshoonet bedam? dokhtare hol mishe mige are are pesare mige oonvare khiaboon tabagheye dovome darmangah!
21-avalin davaye zanashooie adam va hava chenin sabt shode ast ke adam be khodavand shekayat nemood ey khodaye bozorg in hava tamame shorthaye mara ke az barg bood dolme pichide va khorde!
22-abadan zelzele miyad yeki ro az zire avar ba hezar zahmat daresh miyaran taraf mige: eyval vibraro hal kardin?! 
23- ye pashe ba ye morche ezdevaj mikone ama bachedar nemishan, akhe morchehehe pashe band mizade!
24-be ye lore migan saat chande balad naboode javab bede mige boro boro diret shode!
25-vali khodayy tikeye kheyli badi joloye jam behem andakht. -jedi? rasti gofti tike, hale khaharet chetore?!
26-pesare rashtie ye ketab minevese avalesh minevise taghdim be babam ke dooste pedaram bood!
27-torke mire bank vaam begire ... zamen nadashte monfajer mishe!
28-be ye torke migan mamaneto bishtar doos dari ya abjito? mige abjito!
29-On chiye ke marda dar miyaran, zana mikhoran?! Ye loghme noone!
30-be ye torke migan ye peyghambare zan nam bebar mige payambare akram!
31-be torke migan awalin nafary ke raft makke hajy shod ki bood? mige HAAJ zanboore asal!
32-torke dore khodesh micharkhe harz mishe!
33-torke mashhad too haram boode ... yeho mibine ke ye dokhtare khoshgel moshgel miyad ... mire poshte haram ke dokhtararo did bezane ... dokhtare shoorooo mikone be doa ke ey emamreza ... be man ghyafe dadi, madare khoob dadi, pedare khoob dadi, faghat ye shohare khob ham behem bede ... yeho troke az poshte haram miyad biroon mige:eee emam reza .. chera hol midi khodam daram miram!
34-ye rooz ye torke ba ye rashtie ba ye arabe ba ye ghazvinie ba mashhadie ba ye karajie baye ahvazie ba ye kermanie ba ye amrikaye ba ye englisie ba ye faransavie ba ye almanie ba ye japonie ba man toro sare kar gozashtim! 
35-be ye torke migan sezariano tarif kon che amalie? mige bache be sharte chaghoo!
36-zane rashtie ba shoharesh dava mikone sare bachedar nashodanesh. marde mige boro biroon ta bachedar nashody hagh nadary biyay khoone!
37-ye ruz ye bacheyi mibare fotokopiye shenasnamasho mide be nazemesh ,nazemesham behesh mige esmeto poshtesh benevis!
38-yerooz ye bande khodaee az roo saghfe khoonashoon miofte mige ye emam hasan yedafe yeki beine hava va zamin migiresh miporse:kodoom hasan ?~~~javab mide asgari velesh mikoone mige man mojtabashoonam!
39-be torke migan kore khar mige ee yani enghadr javoonam?!
40-mardha be 3 dalil sade hastand: 1-chon az derakht bala miran ba in ke midonan age sabr konan sibe khodesh miyofte... 2-zoodi geyrati mishan ba in ke midoonan age sabr konan hame chi ba harf hal mishe... 3-donbale zana rah miyoftan ba in ke midoonan age sabr konan khode zane miyad soragheshoon!
41- torke pool nadashte bere hamoom kapsoole cherk khosh kon mikhore!
42-ye rooz ye torke mire emam-zade mibine sholooghe va hame daran dado bi dad mikonan. dad mizane baba sholoogh nakonin, parsal sholoogh kardin hajatha ghati shod man hamele shodam!
43-torke aslahe mizare ro saresh shelik mikone bad az 1 saat mimire , az doctor miporsan chera bad az 1 saat mord? mige akhe tire dashte donbale maghzesh migashte!
44-torke zanesho mikoshe mire marhale bad, vaghti bar migarde mibene zanesh zendas, midooni chera? chon save nakarde boode. taze madar zanesho ham mikoshe joon migire!
45-ghazviniya ba farhangestane zaban dava mikonan ke chera toye alefba be "n" migan "noon" vali be "k" migan "kaf"?!
46-khoda mibineh jahanam khaliyeh hame raftan behesht az jebreel miporseh chera? migeh akheh soalayeh shabe avale ghabr lo rafteh!
47-ye ordake pash gir mikone laye dare otoboos mige mag mag, badesh hame migam AMRICA!
48-ye rooz ye Ghoorbaaghe he mast mikone , shenaa parvaane mire!
49-ye rooz ye dokhtare zesht az ye shaer miporse man va khorshid che shabahati darim? mige be hich kodom nemishe mostaghim negah kard!
50-Ye afsare jeloye ye mashin ro migire, be ranande mige: jenab shoma bekhatere bastane kamarbande imeni,50hezar toman az tarafe anjomane hemayat az imeni rahha jayeze bordid! hala mikhayn ba in pool chikar konid? Ranande: fekr konam beram bahash gavahinamamo begiram! zane ke baghal dastesh nesheste boode mige: jenab sarvan harfasho goosh nakonid, shohare man vaghti maste yeband chertopert mige! too sandalie aghab ye yarooee khaab boode,az saroseda pa mishe mige: man az avalesham goftam ba mashine dozdi nemishe farar kard! yeho yeki az sandogh aghabe mashin dad mizane: bebinam, belakhare az marz gozashtim?!
! بازم یه آلبوم جدید براتون آماده کردم !
Happy New Year 
